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Despite this encouragement, she was not ready to do any search.

Long discussions in therapy never revealed what she feared. According to the great psychologist, Eric Erikson, adolescence involves a search for self identity.

Unfortunately, as illustrated in cases A and C, there are people who discourage such a search and even lie to their adopted child about their origins.

While this search is difficult for most teenagers, it presents special problems for adoptee.

Assuming they never met their natural parents and family and have no idea of their genetic background, they are left with a gigantic gap in their search to answer the age old question, "Who am I." Of course, the more information available to young people, the less of a gap there is in the information they need to formulate a real sense of themselves.

In addition, a Google search of the internet will yield lots of research studies done on this very issue. It is very common for those who were adopted to feel rejected and abandoned by their birth parents. There is no set time or age when these feeling surface but, sooner or later, they do. Feelings of loss and rejection are often accompanied by a damaged sense of self esteem.

There is an understandable tendency to think that "something must be wrong with me for my birth parents to have give me away." It must be understood that these feelings and thoughts are unrelated to the amount of love and support received from the adoptive parents and family. Guilt accompanies loss and grief because the adopted individual believes that they are being disloyal to the people who adopted, loved and raised them.

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